There is nothing scarier than having to take your child to the ER or getting a call from the daycare/school that 911 had to be called for your child. I’ve been there, more than once and with more than one child. I’m not going to lie, the fear never goes away, but you do learn how to manage the situation a little better each time. 

When you are worried for your child, it’s easy to forget about what you need to ask the doctors or medical team. But, usually in these instances, it’s vital to ask questions. That is why in part 3 of this series, I’m discussing questions to ask on a trip to the ER. 

What to Ask the Paramedic 

Unless you take your child directly to the ER, you’ll be riding in an ambulance. The first question to ask is if you ride with your child. It likely depends on the paramedic, but they’ve always let me ride with my toddlers. 

If you have a spouse, grandparent or someone else coming with you, they usually need to ride separately. Note: If you are going to Brenner Children’s Hospital (which I highly recommend), you can pull up in front of their children’s ER entrance and valet the vehicle which is free. 

Everything is obviously situational, but here are some possible questions to ask your paramedic:

• How long will it take us to get to whichever hospital you tell them (they will ask when they pick you up)? 
• Where do I go when I get there? Often your child will be separated momentarily from you when you check in and they take them to a room. 
• What do you need me to do? Then, follow their directions!

The most important thing is to stay calm. Your child needs you to do that no matter how much you are freaking out on the inside. Also, do not forget your personal belongings in the ambulance – this coming from a mother who left her cell phone in my very first ambulance ride as a parent with my oldest daughter! Luckily, the paramedic saw it and brought it to me. 

What to Ask the Nurse

The nurse in the ER is going to be your main contact throughout your visit. If you are there for a while, yes that happens often, you might go through more than one nurse. Keep in mind they are likely short-staffed and doing the best they can, and they are usually the messenger for the doctors. Try not to take out your fears and stress on them when they are just there to help.

Here are some common questions to ask your ER nurse:

• How long will it take to be seen by the doctor? Trust me, I know it’s hard to wait around while your child is in pain or sick, but they do factor in the severity of each patient. 
• Where can I go to get some food or drinks? Remember that, while waiting, you’ll likely get hungry or thirsty at some point. This is when it helps to have a second person with you. 
• Can we have visitors? This is helpful to ask if someone is bringing you food or items from home you need. I’ve never had issues with them allowing it, but it’s important to always ask and keep them informed. 

The biggest thing is to alert them if there are any changes in your child’s symptoms or behaviors. Everything matters when you are in the ER. 

What to Ask the Doctor

When you do finally get to see the doctor, it’s important to ask all the questions you need to then while you have their attention. As every illness, injury, etc. is situational, you’ll need to ask questions related to it, so here is a list of questions to start with and consider. 

• What tests will my child need? 
• When will we get those results? 
• How long will we need to be in the ER? 
• Does my child need to stay overnight? If they say yes, then ask why? 
• Will my child need surgery? 
• What warning signs should I look for while they are here in the room to tell the medical staff? 

Here is an example of questions related to situational issues. Once they start discussing what they think is the issue, you need to think about various factors that will impact your child, not just at the ER visit but in the future, as well. 

When my middle daughter was in the ER for a febrile seizure, I asked if this was something she’d be more prone to have with a fever every time now? When he said yes, I asked if there was a certain age that she might grow out of it. 

What to Ask the Surgeon

Unfortunately, some issues are serious enough on an ER trip to warrant surgery. Whether that surgery needs to occur on the same visit or at a later date, here are some questions to consider asking your surgeon: 

• How long will the surgery take? 
• What are the risks and side effects? 
• Are there any other alternatives to surgery? 
• Is general or local anesthesia required? 
• When will I get to see my child after surgery? 
• Where do I wait while my child is undergoing surgery? 
• Are there any potential complications with the surgery? 
• What are the post-op requirements? It’s especially important to find out when they can eat/drink again as well as be active. 

They will ask, but it’s important to stress you need to share every possible detail with your surgical team, from when they last ate to what medications they are on. All of these answers impact the effect of anesthesia on your child. 

Oftentimes an ER visit, an illness or disease, or trying to diagnose an issue warrant further examination from a specialist, and that’s why part 4 of the series is, “Questions to ask the specialists.”