Letter to Santa: First Draft

Dear Santa,

You’ve probably just finished dinner and are relaxing by the fireside with your hard-working elves.  I trust the majority of your holiday preparations are complete and your 2018 goals achieved.  I know that your fastidiousness will make circumnavigation a breeze and your presents will fill all the boys and girls with joy.  How was your Thanksgiving?

This year, for Christmas, I want diapers, baby wipes, a Radio Flyer wagon, extra socks, a new iPhone, a bigger TV, a 2019 Toyota 4-Runner (for the new baby and all his gear, of course), some pleasantly scented candles, a remodeled bathroom, new diamond earrings, a dinner date with my husband without the baby in tow, a matching scarf and hat, and four extra weeks of vacation.  Please.

Sincerely, Jennifer

Letter to Santa: Second Draft with greater clarity

Dear Santa,

I just ate so much I cannot walk.  I drank too many glasses of wine and told my mother-in-law where to put her suggestions for how to manage my work-life-baby balance.  I have done zero shopping for the holiday, our Christmas tree has not had a drop of water, and once I make it through the holidays, 2019 will be MY year to lose weight, save money, and get a hobby.  My laziness and apathy have been well hidden, and my responsibilities successfully shirked.  How was your Thanksgiving?

This year, for Christmas, I want diapers, size two and three, baby wipes and a baby-wipe warmer. A Radio Flyer wagon with side-boards and whitewall off-road tires.  An iPhone X, matching headset, and an upgraded iPad with a smartwatch to go along with it.  A four-wheel drive 2019 Toyota 4-Runner with leather interior, sunroof, and Bose sound system.  Tranquil mist, apple cider, ocean breeze, soft cotton, honey melon, and fragrant fir will be a good starting place for any scented candles you can send my way. I’ll take both votives and jar candles. The bathroom needs to be tiled in Venetian marble with “his and her” sinks, a closet for the commode, and a weekly cleaning service.  For the new earrings: a single carat will be fine, for each ear.  And as for the date night: my husband should be showered, wearing a shirt and tie, and please let it be somewhere other than Tin-Tin China Buffet!  Hermes cashmere will be acceptable for the scarf and hat, and really I’d prefer just to keep getting paid and not go back to work at all.  Please, Sir.

Letter to Santa: Third Draft, new start

Dear Santa,

Happy Thanksgiving! Jesus was born 2000 odd years ago in a stable?  Didn’t they keep animals in the stable?  Do stables have running water and electricity?  And what’s this about His parents being refugees traveling to complete a census?  Then immediately evacuating, because King Herod made a decree to kill all the children? This is the Lamb of God.  How do I give thanks? This year, for Christmas, can you teach me to be a person of peace and a speaker of truth in love this year? Can you rekindle in my heart your eternal hope?

Humbly, Jennifer

My Christian tradition has given me faith that God’s love is fulfilled in Jesus’ perfect life on earth, hope in the resurrection and life eternal, and confidence that love will overcome.  This year for Christmas, I pray for eyes to see and gratitude to share for all the blessings we have in the birth of the infant Jesus.